MAN-DEPENDENT

After graduation many girls have the only dream of getting married. Aspirations and worries of married life top their wish list. But I am quite different. I have different goals. I am graduated and still jobless. I am worried about getting admissions into a good college for my Post-Graduation. I am much more worried about becoming self-dependent. Let me share with you the small problems which girls like me, who think unconventionally, face in the middle class environment.

         I was traveling to my home town for holidays. I successfully managed to get a window seat all alone.Yes,”Successfully managed”?. Common we all know how much crowded our A.P.S.R.T.C buses are during the holiday season. Well that’s not what is important now. Coming to the point, I was very happy with my window seat because it is a tiresome four hour journey and I needed some fresh air.

The bus started. I relaxed listening to music. I called my mom to inform her that I started home. Recognizing that I speak a familiar language to her, an aunt sitting beside me started to grow curious about me. Bingo! She got a time pass to entertain herself on this tiresome journey. No sooner did I finish the phone call, she showered questions over me.

Auntiji asked “Is it your Ammi?”

I replied “Yes Auntiji”.

Then she started making sympathetic faces and asked “Oh dear! Why are you traveling all alone?”

I wished to say ‘Come on Auntiji why are you acting as I was dying. It’s just a four hour journey and it’s like finding some peaceful time to sit and finish of a good magazine’. But I humbly replied “Because I study here and I am going back home for my holidays”.

Then she started firing random questions, consoling me and assuring me that she was there to take care of me during the entire journey. I was irritated at first. But, later I was amazed by her curiosity. I smiled.

Auntiji again started asking “Are you studying all alone?”

I wished to say “Yeah I don’t want to do my studies all alone and I wish Y.S.R would have come back and pass some more educational reforms apart from scholarships. Something like the entire family should join the studies. How about I read 2 chapters and Auntiji you do the rest of it and we both write my exam and I pass it. Good suggestion na.”

Instead I smiled again.

Auntiji: “Has any guy come to send me off at the station?” ”Chacha?,Mama?,bhaiya?”

I: “No Auntiji”.

Auntiji: “KHAASSS DOSTTT????????” and started making faces again…

Now I completely got the clue of her intentions. I had to calm down her curiosity by saying that my Bhai is going to pick me up at the station, when I reach there. Hoping the aunty is pacified, I, I started reading. I successfully avoided her next question by acting as if I were completely involved in my book.

I understand people feel that a girl must be ‘MAN-DEPENDENT’. But I want to be ‘SELF-DEPENDENT’. I feel good doing things on my own. This makes me independent, grown up, able. If I go somewhere without an accomplice, it doesn't mean that my family is not bothered about me. It simply means that they trust me. They are confident that I can take care of myself in such small things and they have taught me well. In fact my family feel honored as I grow and manage new situations. Sometimes some mistakes happen, but I still learn from them and grow. If a girl learns new things, aspires to lead life; a little bit, independent it’s not the innocence of her that is lost. It’s the ignorance.

What kind of offense am I committing, if I go out with my friends for just a panipuri, if I feel like having a walk alone and enjoy myself, if a friend drops me home. I simply become a prey of suspicious gossip mongering aunties.

I know gossip and spreading rumors is the most successful mechanism by you aunties of society to relieve yourself from the frustration of day-to-day lives. But still have you not assigned that responsibility to be rumored about to the film-stars and Rakhi Sawanth. Why me? Why me?

I want to say: “Come on!!! Please have a life. You have much more important things to do with your life. You can prevent Uncle, who is already over paid for his government job, from taking bribes. You can even stop Dadaji from ending up in to an old-age home. Even if that is not possible you can at least teach your sons to behave and respect girls when they go out.”

Please just realize that self-dependence and aspiring girls like me are not a threat to the morals of society. But by hurting us you are meddling with the future of the society.

no no

My greatest achievement is that i am not you.

My greatest regret is that yesterday i was aspiring to be you.

You hurt me and let me down.

But I thank you for showing me practically that no one can make you feel inferior expect yourself.

Because of you I realized that my greatest aspiration is not in achieving success,fame and riches but it lies in not loosing my integrity and character even after reaching great heights.

                                                                                                   THANK YOU.

p.s: plz don't hurt any person because they might not be able to gather the strength and integrity to face it.

                                                      HEAL

Today I can understand why people are still happy, even though they lose everything. I have learnt that every wound teaches me and also that there is a magic called healing in the life. Of lately I understand that scars are the worthiest possessions that one can have because they keep on reminding the past lessons. I realize that there was no need to worry so much about the things out of my control. Today I have learnt that to find solutions I must constantly tame my mind to stop bothering, be patient and start working. Today I no longer fear the unknown because I have already faced the dangers of the comfort zone. And it’s today that I really feel i have grown.

                                                                                                                 -starlet

MY ONLY LIFE

Sometimes life gives us many gifts

And I smile with no reasons.

Sometimes the much adored things of life lose their meaning.

And I feel how stupid I was.

Sometimes I act completely responsible.

And like a super hero I save the day.

Sometimes I lose control and screw up things.

And start wishing that a genie from Aladdin come and do some magic.

Sometimes an unexpected huge tide tries to shatter me.

And surprisingly I overcome it and stand there tall.

Wow!!! Me.

Sometimes I suppress my raised voice with uncertainty.

Then I make things happen when I realize an honest voice is much louder than a crowd.

There are days when I am completely addicted to a silly video game.

And I blew all my grades.

Sometimes I feel untalented just because I am not like all the other silly girls.

I am the only girl on this planet who doesn’t know the art of matching accessories, enjoy shopping, all the nakhra and nazakat. I hate attending parties and pink.

And I have the unconventional fascination towards cars.

Sometimes I am very skeptical about people.

And never let anyone into the territory of my heart even when I need a friend to share.

Sometimes I simply get carried away even for a silly innocent smile.

Sometimes I win in making the most precious friends.

Sometimes I sit in the corridor with my gang commenting every guy on the road.

I even whistle at strangers and hide myself so that my innocent friend standing beside me is booked.

Yes I am that naughty.

Sometimes I become the center stage attraction and hypnotize the audience in a state level event.

And sometimes I babble nonsense in my nervousness to face a silly college level competition, make the audience sleep. I disappear for a week from college trying to avoid all the silly comments.

Yeah it happens.

Sometimes I waste the entire semester by bunking classes, sleeping, chatting. My friends and lectures pray for me, in pity, just to clear all my exams. Though I start reading just before the exam, still top all of them.

Sometimes I oppose everyone, I oppose when I am forced to do what I don’t want.

Get used to it so much that I even misunderstand and hurt a friend.

There are times I lied to my papa and stay home just to watch my favorite serial “shaktimaan”

Sometimes I tolerate the external noise to avoid the painful screams of my wounded soul.

I simply start crying with no reason.

I scream “why me God”

Sometimes I am punctual, strict, disciplined. But that just lasts for some time.

Sometimes I vow to skip my bad habits.

I can’t hold my tongue .I speak a lot, make correct bold statements. But I always end up saying them in the wrong situation and wrong time. I commit a social-suicide and lose all my friends.

Sometimes I find the entire world abnormal.

At times even a single breeze can shatter me.

Then I realize it’s not the fault of breeze. I let it happen to me, in my innocence.

Weird. Unconventional, Uncommon. But still me. It’s my life. I LIVE IT ON MY OWN TERMS.

U can do any number of mistakes. You have the right to be stupid. You can be innocent. You can be whatever you want. It’s not a crime .the real crime is when you fail to learn from them. The much bigger crime is if you fail to realize that you are responsible for everything you do. And the biggest crime is that if you drag someone else in to your madness of fun.  

Lyrics to Butterfly Fly Away :
You tuck me in,
Turn out the light
keep me safe and sound at night
little girls depend on things like that

Brush my teeth and combed my hair
had to drive me everywhere
you were always there when I looked back

You had to do it all alone
Make a live, make a home
Must have been as hard as it could be

And when I couldn't sleep at night
Scare things wouldn't turn out right
you would hold my hand and sing to me

Caterpillar in the tree, how you wonder who you'll be
can't go far but you can always dream
Wish you may and wish you mine
don't you worry hold on tight.
I promise you there will come a day
Butterfly Fly Away
Butterfly Fly Away (butterfly fly away)

Catch your wing now you can’t stay
Take those dreams and make them all come true
Butterfly Fly Away (butterfly fly away)
We been waiting for this day
All along and know just what to do
Butterfly,Butterfly,Butterfly,
Butterfly Fly Away

(Butterfly Fly Away)

KYAA KARE?

FEW QUESTIONS RAISE IN MY MIND AFTER LISTENING TO WHAT HAD HAPPEN BACK SOME 17 YEARS AGO.IN A GREATLY DIVERSE NATION,WHERE DIFFERENCES ARE NEVER NEGOTIATED AND THE HUNGRY POLITITIONS CAN EASILY INDUSE VANDALISM JUST BY RAISING VEHEMENCE WITH IN PEOPLE' HEART SUCH INCIDENTS ARE MUCH LIKELY TO OCCUR.

BUT SOME SAY THAT IT WAS DURING THE TIME OF OUR FATHERS.NOW AN ENTIRE NEW GENERATION HAS EMERGED WITH NEWER PERSPECTIVES, BROADER MINDSETS AND CLEAR THOUGHTS.ITS NOT THAT OUR GENERATION HAS FORGOT ABOUT ALL THE PAIN BUT WE HAVE SOME MUCH IMPORTANT ISSUES TO HANDLE.

WHY TO MAKE SUCH AN ISSUE AND WORRY ABOUT IT WHEN WE HAVE MANY OTHER IMPORTANT THINGS IN OUR BRAIN?

ITS JUST THAT WE CAN’T IGNORE THE POSSIBILITY OF THAT OLD DADAJI’S FUNDAMENTAL ULTRA RELIGIOUS ATTITUDE TO CREEP WITHIN OUR NATION WITH HIGHEST CAPABLE YOUTH.

SIMPLY BECAUSE OUR COUNTRY IS AFRAID TO HANDLE THE IRRESPONSIBLE EGO’S OF ITS VARIOUS RELIGIOUS SECTIONS WE CAN’T SHOW A BLIND EYE TOWARDS MISCREATANTS.OUR LEGAL SYSTEM HAS TO PUNISH THE MISCREANTS.

LETS NOT FORGET LORD RAMA DIDN’T TOOK BITRTH TO CLAIM A PLACE OF LAND BUT A PLACE IN OUR HEART TO TEACH US WHAT IS GOOD AND BAD.

LET’S THE MISCREANT BE PUNISHED.AND LET WE HAVE A RECONCIALATION.LET OUR NEW GENERATION BUILD A TEMPLE OR A MOSQUE OF KNOWLEDGE OR HUMANITY.A UNIVERSITY.OR A RESEARCH CENTER.OR ATLEAST AN ORPHANAGE IN THAT PLACE.

WORDS

I am preparing for a competitive exam and as part of it I have to memorize some thousands of words. Every morning I wake up and memorize them, revise them, search for them, connect with them and use them. Off course we all do this but in the process I realized the importance of words.

Words! Without them what could we have done? They help us express ourselves, connect to others communicate, describe and understand. We humans have invented them to make us think the matter or the information they carry within them. When I see the situation for example a child playing in the garden .I will have a beautiful feeling in my heart of the seen right there .I may come and pen down or at least express to a person some thousands of words .I may say the innocent child playing in the green grass, with beautiful flowers around, with colorful butterflies flying and fluttering away and her gleaming eyes filled with an essence of joy reflecting the shadows of the colors on their wings. Her arms stretched apart in happiness. One of her palm towards the yellow butterfly depicting her curiosity to catch it hold it in his hand and discover the pattern of colors on its wings.

I may go on describing. But will they be helpful to accurately describe the joy ,the emotions, the feelings I felt at the moment I saw her play. Well I am just an amateur writer. Consider some other person who is very good at writing or expression. Though he may use lakh’s of words will he still be able to describe the situation. If this is the case with an expert then consider the situation of a layman. He may use only a few words.

Though we all are successful in describing what we feel in perfect words will anyone guaranty me that the listener will understand exactly what we felt and empathize us.no.so should I say that words are not important.

At least the words give us information. The information is knowledge. And more over don’t forget the commercial punch lines help to improve the brand sale.wll we are now off the topic. Words help us to transact, record the history. Words connect bring back our past, show what we are now and also summaries all the aspirations and hopes of our future. Words guide us. They give form to human thoughts, Principles. Sometimes they are passed on to generations depicting heredity, culture, and customs.

Knowing the importance of words mankind has collected the words, memorizes, learns and started to preserve them in the form of scriptures, tablets, books, documents, p.d.fs. And fought killed, stood by to preserve them.

But in the race to acquire words we forgot that words are actually used to make us think. Words make us understand. The purpose of words is to just give a clue of the situation and the rest we must think, we must feel it. We are so acquainted in listening to words that we totally ignored the language. The language of feeling .we forgot to listen what the nature tells. The music within the sea shell, the chirping of the birds’, the signs, the omens, the beauty of ocean tides, the warmth of sunshine, the cold wind, and the smell of the earth on its first romance with the monsoon. We forget everything.

The words are used to connect us. Lead us. But they are now misleading us. When you say “summi” and I call you by your name, when I say Indians, the Americans, the Pakistanis, the Chinese etc all are dividing us. Words are supposed to establish identity, individuality. But the side effect of words has grown much more than its true effect. Instead of helping us its harming us.

The more words the more misunderstandings, the more mistakes, and the more division. Humans will definitely fail if they still don’t listen to the true language behind words.

EXPRESSION

I always wonder why we often do not express what we feel. Sometimes even to ourselves. And by the time we realize what we feel there is no time left.
When something happens to our loved ones we are suddenly ready to give away everything .everything which mattered a lot when they are well will have a diminished priority. We tend to sacrifice everything. Everything we love, seek, own, desire. But still what if the moment is gone? What if we are left with no options?
Some wise man told that we can bring back anything but we can never bring back the time. Well this statement holds true under the premises of ignoring the time machine concept.
And miraculously very few of us are blessed with a chance to express ourselves. Chance to say our loved ones that they are important. They are precious. And I got this chance now.
I wanted to spend some good time with my grandfather.i felt i miss him since a long time. But I could not find ample time. Priorities deterred me. And suddenly one day he was in the I.C.U and I found myself praying to GOD to give me just a single moment. A moment to say some words of expression. To say him that”nanajaan you are precious to me. You taught me many good things in life.i got to learn a lot from you.many of the principles you showed have become the way of my life.thank u..its you who provided an good healthy environment for my intellectual growth. And I love you so much”.i was ready to give away anything for him. GOD answered my prayers. He cured eventually. And from then I never take a chance in failing to express my care and love.

NOTHING BUT PURE LOVE

she wants him to love her

love her unconditionally

even if she is not beside him

love her out of bed

love her even if she is stubborn

even if she wont negotiate with him

love her for following her heart

love her for being her-self

love her even if she won't dissolve his impatience

even if she is not his perfect match

love her even if she wont accepts his mistakes

Love her even if she is not his trophy wife

- starlet

she is fine

One of my friend has completed her post graduation in a prestigious college.she did that just on the basis of her merit.later she was married off by her parents.her husband also being a professional doesn't allow her to work.she accepted his feelings.he gets angry at her if she didn't cover her face, at least till she walks to the garage of her apartment building.well she is trying to get adjusted even with this.

i don't oppose Hijaab,but i have seen most of the guys throwing that ugly,nasty looks at girls even who r fully covered till their finger tips.so should i not think that the eyes,and the mal-mentality of the man is to be put under the veil.

when men are powerful,highly talented,educated and confident why do they hold the women so much so that the women cant even breathe.men are supposed to protect women as per our culture.but they are harming, degrading women in the name of culture.moral policing of R.S.S a year back n the Mangolore and Bengaluru is the evidence of suppression of men. a man if he thinks he is that great and is bestowed with the protective power towards women by Allah/ super nature/ religion then why doesnt he has faith in himself. why doesn't he has faith in his power.not letting a women live her own life,not letting her act upon of think according to their will is not what Allah/ Super nature/ Religion has blessed?